Showing posts with label YouTube. Show all posts
Showing posts with label YouTube. Show all posts

Thursday, July 12, 2012

Drab to Fab Part Deux: Kitchen Remodel


Looking in During, pardon the clutter, we just moved!
Have you ever sanded and repainted your kitchen cabinet doors?  Don't...just buy new ones.  When you move into a 70's apartment I promise you that the hinges on the cabinets have been painted over with each new tenant since then.

Now you have to break out crowbars, screw drivers, hammers, paint remover and an occasional kitchen knife to get the things off, then you have to sand the cabinet itself, then sand the doors on every surface when this is all done you have to paint them and make sure you get a nice even coating on all surfaces. Then you have to put new hinges on everything, you think your almost done right? Wrong!


Since sanding the cabinet doors back to some sort of an original state they no longer stay shut!  Now, I have to put some sort of little magnetic closure on them so they stay shut...next is the door nobs and drawer pulls. They make a handy dandy little stencil for these little costly bobbles it's all going along great your drilling the holes and you go to put on your first door nob and what happens?  The screw is too short, I see that they come with a second screw...PERFECT!!!...this screw ends up being to long, Homo Depot is across town...now I know why people buy new construction!

Part of our deal with this apartment, which is rent controlled might I add, so we basically bought it...was that instead of a deposit we would put in new appliances...let me tell you about the old fridge, it had one shelf in it and it was filthy, the old stove, which was quote, unquote, a new stove had the rusted electric coils and couldn't regulate heat to save your life, and the old dish washer, although still working and dried dishes very well also made an occasional screeching noise, they are now replaced with stainless steal energy efficient appliances...I feel like my new fridge has a funny smell though, maybe it's just the new plastic smell, it's probably me though.

After the new appliances we tiled the back splash...this was so much fun, my mother came out and  helped The Husband and I do it.  Now she can do almost anything, as can I, but I had never tiled anything before, and I am sure with enough YouTube videos and Google searches I could have figured it out, how do you think I learned how to make butter!?

I will tell you though, it's very easy to tile and grout, what is hard to getting the grout off of your tile...I don't think I've ever rinsed a sponge that much in my life...end result, pure fabulousness!

If I can pass on a bit of advice though, don't paint your walls if you are going to be putting in a tiled back splash, why?  If you paint before you are going to be doing a ton of touch ups after words, because the trowel scratches the paint...lesson learned!

Watch Your Drink,

The Stepford Husband

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Mr. Bachmann GAY? I Need a moment to fix my Gaydar!

The Husband and I were watching Fox News last night, the Iowa Caucus was on and it was quite an interesting showdown between all of them, all five hours of it. It really reaffirms my opinion that we need to fix our education system...because those bitches can't count!

But the interesting part of it wasn't who won but who wasn't even in the race...namely Marcus Bachmann, AKA Mr. Michele Bachmann.  Now, he definitely has a portly cherub sort of look to him, and while Michele was talking about marriage between one man and one woman, I looked over at Mr. Michele Bachmann and my Gaydar Spiked!  You all know what I'm talking about...

I looked over at The Husband and I said, "He is so gay!"

The Husband responded, "Totally, and it looks like he has herpes on his lip...Michele was probably back stage yelling at him, I told you not to suck that dick now look at you, and I have to go up on stage in five minutes!"

Me being the Google master, I hoped on my I phone and I started typing Mr. Bachm...second suggested search term was Mr. Bachmann Gay!!! Ding Dong the gaydar just started playing "It's Raining Men!"

As I am looking through the search results, I see one article mentioning Cher...Yes, Ladies and Gents The Cher...was watching him one night and started a twitter chatter about how she thought he was so gay, soon sequined and feather bedazzled Cher fans the world over were organizing and spreading the news that The Cher just outed Mr. Michele Bachmann...let's face it, if The Cher doesn't have a highly tuned Gaydar, I don't know who would!

No investigatory mission would be complete without video evidence, so I found this video.  Now, I recommend closing your eyes and listening...just listening, I think you will find that you hear little tiny Prada, Gucci, Fendi, and Louis Vuitton purses falling on the floor with each lisping, high pitched gay squeak!


Watch Your Drink,

The Stepford Husband

P.S. Did anyone else notice Rick Perry's extremely cross-eyed daughter?

Tuesday, December 13, 2011